Walk That Parkinson's Disease Off, Michael J. Fox

Now there are a great number of things I'd rather do than listen to Rush Limbaugh. Castrate myself, for instance, or finger induce the likely explosive cleansing of Carlos Mencia's colon while watching an all musical episode of "According To Jim" with an original score by a Nickleback/Puddle of Mudd side project. However today I found it very difficult to ignore Rush, being that he seems to have swallowed up the American news networks whole. Now, more often than not I'd just be pissed to see networks wasting time with this type of bullshit, non-issue gossip, but this instance really does speak volumes about Rush Limbaugh's character (or lack thereof), so I figured I'd mention it.
You see, actor Michael J. Fox, who most of you no doubt know has Parkinson's Disease, appeared in a television ad endorsing Claire McCaskill who is running in the upcoming U.S. election for Senator of Missouri. In the ad Fox urges voters to cast their ballot for McCaskill stating that her opponent stands against stem cell research, a practice that might very well someday be able to cure a number of diseases like Parkinson's.



Now, Limbaugh, being the ever insensitive, fundamentalist, right-wing, steaming piece of diseased rodent shit that he is, immediately attacked Michael J. Fox claiming;

"Michael J. Fox should be ashamed of himself for using his disease to mislead voters...he was either off his medication or he was acting. He is an actor, after all."

Limbaugh ofcourse, refering to Michael J. Fox's shaking so much in the ad, claiming that it was exaggerated. What a fuckin' douchebag for the ages.


Dear Rush,

Fight on you patriot soldier. There are far too few of those like yourself these days who are willing to stick up for Americans in the face of weak, crippled freedom hating disease victims. I salute you, sir. Michael J. Fox was clearly faking those symptoms (quite poorly in my opinion) in order to garner sympathy from the viewers. Viewers who might believe that Parkinson's Disease is anything other than the magical funhouse of happy thoughts and increased energy that you and I both know it to be. Michael J. Fox pretending that his condition is in some way incapacitating or difficult to bear is an insult to the American public. It should be made widely known that the primary symptom of Parkinson's Disease is a multiple orgasm twice every hour and not some silly fidgeting and Ray Charles like head bobbing. The fact that this incident is being widely reported does bring me some hope however. Should your report act as a journalistic precident then perhaps someday we can break the lid off of the African people's willfull practices of Anorexia and Bulimia which is used to much the same sympathy soliciting purpose in Amnesty International ads. Everyone knows you're faking it, Africa!

Yours,
Kevin N. Burke

P.S. Also, tell those autistic mother fuckers that they aren't fooling anyone either. Punk ass bitches.