Tragedy Ltd.

Tired of the same old tragic events? Does the banal, monotonous way in which the latest war is reported bore you to death? Has the blah, blah, blah of famine or plane crash victims got you ready to change the channel? If so, get ready for X-Treme Tragedy! The nation's most radical 24 hour news network. Everyone knows that Africans are starving, so who wants to see them interviewed in the same old depressing village? Not us. How about interviewing a malnurished African...while sky diving! To the Max! Children with their limbs blown off? Boring! But not while shreding down Bella Coola on a rocket-powered snowboard! Wicked! Our crack team of X-treme reporters crank up the arenaline factor to bring you the most amped, tricked out tragedies you've ever seen. Soundtracked to the latest new rock, alternative music you'll see AIDS victims bungee jumping for medication, homeless Iraqis tearing it up on a 16' vertical half-pipe for their chance to win canned goods for their family, and much more. So join Trip Slickerton, Trey Zapowitz, Trace Slam, Blackey Rap McStereotype and The Female One as they pimp out the news so that you don't have to think about it. X-Treme Tragedy! Where we put the X in Global Eventsx!