I Have An Idea (And Appearently I'm Hungry)
Dear President Bush,
I have an idea for the future of the United States.
I think that stupid people should have their own country, let's call it...the south. The north would continue destroying the planet with zero accoutability capitalism and we'd all become slaves to our industrial masters. In 2047 a very brave man takes it upon himself to try and unionize Burger King, but he is very quickly killed and his murder hushed up by the news media. His twin sons strap bombs to themselves and each blow up a Burger King restaurant as an act of revenge. Burger King blames the attacks on McDonald's who they claim has been secretly creating apple pies of McMass Destruction. Once a bill is passed unanimously through Fast Food Congress allowing the company to use all force necessary to protect themselves from snack-food terror, Burger King attacks several McDonald's locations with the support of Taco Bell and Quizno's. Subway, having suffered severe damage to many locations, accuses the Quizno's soldiers as using the battle to take out their competition by deliberately providing Burger King with intelligence only detailing the McDonald's sites located next to Subway locations. They side with McDonald's, as does Wendy's. Following a bloody 9 year war everyone in the United States North becomes healthier. The South is still dumb. Jesus finally returns as prophecised in the book of Revelations, but there are no more Big Macs so he's pissed. He takes out his crossbow that shoots bullets with lasers in them and takes out Godzilla. He then turns the planet into a bizarro type world where humans are grown and raised on farms where they are slaughtered at the age of 20 to make tasty treats that are served to literal capitalist pigs in fast food restaurants. The irony goes unnoticed. The end.
Kevin N. Burke
Also, WICKED MOVIE IDEA #3:
- Cinderella Man VS. X-Men 2: The Movie
I have an idea for the future of the United States.
I think that stupid people should have their own country, let's call it...the south. The north would continue destroying the planet with zero accoutability capitalism and we'd all become slaves to our industrial masters. In 2047 a very brave man takes it upon himself to try and unionize Burger King, but he is very quickly killed and his murder hushed up by the news media. His twin sons strap bombs to themselves and each blow up a Burger King restaurant as an act of revenge. Burger King blames the attacks on McDonald's who they claim has been secretly creating apple pies of McMass Destruction. Once a bill is passed unanimously through Fast Food Congress allowing the company to use all force necessary to protect themselves from snack-food terror, Burger King attacks several McDonald's locations with the support of Taco Bell and Quizno's. Subway, having suffered severe damage to many locations, accuses the Quizno's soldiers as using the battle to take out their competition by deliberately providing Burger King with intelligence only detailing the McDonald's sites located next to Subway locations. They side with McDonald's, as does Wendy's. Following a bloody 9 year war everyone in the United States North becomes healthier. The South is still dumb. Jesus finally returns as prophecised in the book of Revelations, but there are no more Big Macs so he's pissed. He takes out his crossbow that shoots bullets with lasers in them and takes out Godzilla. He then turns the planet into a bizarro type world where humans are grown and raised on farms where they are slaughtered at the age of 20 to make tasty treats that are served to literal capitalist pigs in fast food restaurants. The irony goes unnoticed. The end.
Kevin N. Burke
Also, WICKED MOVIE IDEA #3:
- Cinderella Man VS. X-Men 2: The Movie
posted by Hooligan at 8:04 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home